Even though it is your very first poem, it has some *fabulous* moments. You are going to be a wonderful poet. Also, you made such a great choice in using the "catalog technique," which provides immediate cohesion to a poem (and is very Whitman, too :) ) If you haven't heard the technique called that, you can learn more here: https://www.tweetspeakpoetry.com/2011/05/21/how-to-write-a-catalog-poem-or-not/
Welcome, Mike! So great to have you with us. :)
Even though it is your very first poem, it has some *fabulous* moments. You are going to be a wonderful poet. Also, you made such a great choice in using the "catalog technique," which provides immediate cohesion to a poem (and is very Whitman, too :) ) If you haven't heard the technique called that, you can learn more here: https://www.tweetspeakpoetry.com/2011/05/21/how-to-write-a-catalog-poem-or-not/
You can find many, many free resources over at Tweetspeak. Also, if you want something portable, succinct, and well-rounded, try out Tania Runyan's How-to-Trio! :) https://www.tweetspeakpoetry.com/2021/04/10/national-poetry-month-book-giveaway-tell-us-your-poetry-story-to-enter/